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Chelsea News
Local news for Chelsea, MA continually updated from thousands of sources on the web.
- Grant to fund boardwalk in Chelsea
The "boardwalk to nowhere" - as some residents call it - in Admiral's Hill will no longer lead to an empty lot but to the Island End River Park, thanks to a state grant of $395,413. In anticipation of the state ...
- North Best Bets
Ipswich/Salem : Saturday night is ladies night at Chamber Music by Candlelight. Vocal ensemble Tapestry presents "Faces of a Woman," featuring music by, for, and about women.
- High tobacco compliance in Chelsea
A recent review of the city's tobacco control regulations found that Chelsea's compliance rate is excellent in terms of restricting minors access to tobacco products, said Luis Prado, Chelsea's health director.
- Former 'mystery man' gets 30 months for ID theft
A man who used so many identities that prosecutors initially couldn't tell who he was has been sentenced to two-and-a-half years in prison.
- Chelsea to honor residents and groups for boosting the community
The seventh annual All-Chelsea Awards ceremony is scheduled to take place at 6:30 p.m. Dec.
- Spanish Latin-American Literature Club
University of Texas of the Permian Basin Professor Rhina Toruo-Haensly founded a new Spanish Latin-American Literature Club and introduced its new president, Glenda Amaya, Oct.
- Airport travelers to get socked by tolls
Not only that, but how about the people who want to get to Eastie to visit their friends? While I understand that they want to milk the airport for all it's worth, this also ends up isolating East Bostonians ...
- Concern over safety soaring in Hub area
Nearly half of Suffolk County adults are concerned about violence in their neighborhoods, more than double the percentage statewide, according to a new survey.
- Mayor to be Honored with Pope John Award
Mayor Michael McGlynn is one of six individuals who will receive Pope John XXIII High School's first annual Pinnacle Award at a special gala fundraiser in December.
- Albert J. Thistle
Albert J. Thistle, 81, of Seabrook, died Tuesday, Oct. 14, 2008 at home. Born in Chelsea, Mass., on Dec.
- Task force fights blight
Mayor Carlo DeMaria Jr. has launched an effort to reinvigorate neighborhoods with too many abandoned properties and illegal rooming houses.
- Officials look for guidelines on marijuana initiative
How will a police officer know whether someone is carrying more than an ounce of marijuana? Will those caught smoking it present sufficient probable cause for an officer to search them or their car? How will ...
- Lynn mana s murder trial expected to turn over to jury
The jury is expected to begin deliberations today in the trial of Spassky "Anderson" Alcequiecz, charged with attacking his ex-girlfriend with a portable battery charger and then stabbing her new lover to death ...
- Problems Voting? Long Lines? Tell us.
Massachusetts voters turned out in droves this morning, forming lines at polling places across the state for their chance to cast a ballot in a historic election.
- Sisters of Providence developing 'small house' nursing home
The health care facility being developed in a meadow here is so revolutionary the state hasn't yet figured out how to regulate it.
- Man tries to lure boy into car with candy
Police are urging parents to be on the look out this Halloween after a man approached a seven-year-old boy on Wednesday afternoon.
- Police warn Chelsea residents of suspicious person
Parents in Chelsea are being warned about a suspicious incident involving a seven-year-old boy who was walking home from school.
- a January shooting that left one dead
UPDATE: Camacho was captured in Mexico City on 10/30. A beefy East Boston teen with a lengthy record of violence is being sought for the triple shooting that left one dead at King Arthur's Lounge in Chelsea ...
- Fake cop sent to real prison
A Plymouth man caught using a fake uniform, handcuffs and a siren to shake down homeless people in Roxbury and immigrants in Chelsea will get to see what real criminals think of his shtik after pleading guilty ...
Chelsea Classifieds
Local classifieds for Chelsea, MA
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City DescriptionChelsea is a city in Suffolk County, Massachusetts, United States directly across the Mystic River from the city of Boston. It is the smallest city in Massachusetts in land area.
The area was first called Winnisimmet, meaning "good spring nearby," by the Massachusett tribe which once lived here. It was settled in 1624 by Samuel Maverick, whose palisaded trading post is considered the first permanent settlement at Boston Harbor. In 1635, Maverick sold all of Winnisimmet, except for his house and farm, to Richard Bellingham. The community remained part of Boston until it was set off and incorporated in 1739, when it was named after Chelsea, a neighborhood in London.
In 1775, the Battle of Chelsea Creek was fought here, the second battle of the Revolution, at which American forces made one of their first captures of a British ship. Part of Washington's army was stationed here during the Siege of Boston.
Chelsea originally included North Chelsea -- all of Revere, Winthrop and parts of Saugus. In 1846, North Chelsea was set off as a separate town. Reincorporated as a city in 1857, Chelsea developed as an industrial center, producing rubber and elastic goods, boots and shoes, stoves and ... Read MoreCity Contained By:- Suffolk County
- Massachusetts
Timezones:- North American Eastern Time Zone
Size:
Source:
Freebase
– The World's Database Freely licensed under
CC-BY.
Questions Possibly Related to Chelsea, MassachusettsProvided By Y! Answers
What are some things or places with the name CHELSEA in them?
Question:
so far i have:
Chelsea...
>Massachusetts.
>football club.
>fight club.
>Lately (Handler).
>Clinton
>new york city neighborhood.
any more???
im just curious since its my name =P
Answer:
Chelsea, Manhattan
The Chelsea Hotel, New York
Chelsea Literary Journal
CHELSEACLOCK
Chelsea Punk Band
Chelsea Technology Group
Chelsea Chamber of Commerce
Chelsea Sugar (From New Zealand)
Chelsea, Vermont
Chelsea Flower Show
That's 10!
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where is this shoe store's address??
Question:
ok so i wanna get new shoes and i dont kno where this shoe store in chelsea massachusetts...it's called expressions of sumthin like that..where is the address!!!??
Answer:
If you wanna to get a new shoes store.I think this link will be helpful.
http://picasaweb.google.com/bagsforyou07
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Some future head lines. Maybe they next 30 years?
Question:
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Cubofloria.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Abortion clinics now available in every
High School in United States.
Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030 .
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Cubofloria voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Answer:
This one made me laugh
"Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage."
Others, meh.
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could this happen News Of The Future hmm i think maybe
Question:
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally . . . scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being over taken by Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise are the keys to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still don't know how to use a voting machine.
Answer:
Roll on the future, mate, these are great...!
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What do you say now undocumented immigrants really do pay taxes here proof now what you got to say ?
Question:
Illegal immigrants are pouring into tax-preparation offices and nonprofit agencies across Massachusetts and the nation to file state and federal income taxes, taking a step that some might deem unthinkable: giving their name, address, and financial information to the government.In Massachusetts, taxpayers here illegally are lining up from Chelsea to the Berkshires, despite the fear of deportation that is permeating the state after a massive raid in New Bedford last year and smaller raids in Boston-area cities and towns. While typical American taxpayers are wary of the Internal Revenue Service, illegal immigrants see the IRS as a friendly agency that could help in their quest for legal residency.
"It's catching on that this is one of the things that you do" as a resident of the United States, said Corinn Williams, executive director of the Community Economic Development Center in New Bedford, which is getting 10 calls a day, double the number it got a year ago, from immigrants who want help filing taxes. "If you're making a case that you want to stay here, without a doubt that's one of the things that the judge is going to look at."http://www.boston.com/news/local/articles/2008/02/17/more_ill egal_immigrants_are_rushing_to_file_taxes/
Answer:
these people wanted to be counted here too. i am a first generation american and my father can call himself an american citizen because he pays his damned taxes.
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Headlines from the year 2029?
Question:
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2029
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia , former ly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens north western United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals, violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Now, send this to whoever you want to and as many as you want and guess what....
NOTHING will happen. No miracles, no money, absolutely nothing, except you might make someone smile.
Answer:
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
I like this one.
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Headlines for the Year 2029?
Question:
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia , former ly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq,Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals, violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Now if any of that made you smile give it a star, go on you know you want to,,,, cheers
Answer:
Thanks it did give me a smile and yes you can have a star,and have a good evening to you and your kind.
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Is this the article "david t" was talking about??
Question:
Home Previous Story Next Story View Comments Post a Comment Send This Page
Illegal Aliens Linked to Gang-Rape Wave
AR Articles on Hispanic Family Values
The Myth of Hispanic Family Values (March 2004)
More news stories on Hispanic Family Values
Chelsea Schilling, WorldNetDaily.com, August 22, 2006
A wave of illegal-immigrant gang rapes is sweeping the U.S. while public officials and law-enforcement authorities fear drawing the link, experts say.
Deborah Schurman-Kauflin, a Ph.D. researcher of violent crimes, told WorldNetDaily, “It appears as if there is a fear that if this is honestly discussed, people will hate all illegal immigrants. So there is silence. … But in being silent about the rapes and murders, it is as if the victims never even existed.â€
Schurman-Kauflin, who runs the Violent Crimes Institute in Atlanta, participated in a 12-month, in-depth study of illegal immigrants who committed sex crimes and murders from January 1999 through April 2006. The study found approximately 240,000 illegal-immigrant sex offenders reside in the United States – while 93 sex offenders and 12 serial sexual offenders come across U.S. borders illegally every day.
Schurman-Kauflin said, “Gang rapes by illegal immigrants appear to be gang related. Many of the cases I reviewed involved gang members. As part of being a cohesive group, they offend together. Inflicting brutal gang rapes brings them closer together as a group. It is a way to demonstrate their power. And it sends a message to anyone who dares to cross them.â€
Americans for Legal Immigration PAC told WND it now is tracking 12 gang rapes by illegal aliens within America’s borders since Oct. 2004.
ALIPAC’s president, William Gheen, said, “These are just the ones we know of. The real number is much higher.â€
Gheen told WND he believes the number of gang rapes is increasing as the population of illegal aliens in the U.S. increases.
“Many illegal aliens have a rape and pillage mentality toward America,†he said. “The government has shown them they can break our laws on many levels without much fear of enforcement. Why should they think of rape or gang rape any differently?â€
Gheen said, “Illegal aliens are more likely to engage in these crimes because rapes and gang rapes are much more common in the gang-rule Third World areas they come from.â€
MS-13, also known as Mara Salvatrucha, a highly organized and well-funded Central American gang, is infiltrating at least 33 states across the U.S., according to law-enforcement authorities. The gang is well-known in Los Angeles, Houston, New York and Washington, D.C., for excessive brutality. Any person suspected of cooperating with authorities is hunted down, tortured and killed. Initiation rites include kickings, beatings and gang rapes.
Gheen said, “These gangs are forcing new female gang members to undergo gang rape to enter the gang and they are asking their male initiates to gang rape American women to become an official member of the gang.â€
MS-13 relies on metropolitan areas with highly concentrated populations of illegal aliens to boost its spreading membership. Chapters require that initiates perform random acts of violence, such as participating in gang rapes, to gain acceptance, confirm law-enforcement officials.
Three MS-13 gang members were charged in the brutal rapes of two deaf girls, one 14, the other 17, in a Massachusetts park in 2002. One victim, who also suffered from cerebral palsy, was pushed out of her wheelchair before being raped repeatedly.
Illegal alien rapists often maintain several aliases, making escaping justice easier.
{snip}
HEY,"alberto"!!! DUMBASS!!!! What's the matter??? Your little PEA SIZED brain can't concentrate that long?? No wonder you are so UNEDUCATED on the topic of ILLEGAL immigration!!!!
DEPORT ALL ILLEGALS>>>>>>>>>>
SUPPORT HR 4437!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Answer:
Are these those same people whom pick all that famous fruit while moon lighting as sex offenders ?
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Our Future's Headlines ?
Question:
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California . White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but t President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals, violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Answer:
reality bites me in the foot reading this
and I'm going to pass it on .....thanks
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Headlines From Year 2029 !!!?
Question:
HEADLINES FROM YEAR 2029 Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in
the seventh largest country in the world, California.
White minorities still trying to have English recognized
as California's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United
States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally... scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual
marriage.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the
American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known
as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at
least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to
safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being overtaken by
Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be
imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has
banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89
and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight
loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such
a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a
woman with her mouth shut.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates
their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven
inches.
New federal law requires that all nailclippers,
screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers
must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political
contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida Democrats still don't know how to use a voting
machine.
Answer:
Hey man Cool Stuff!
Good Imagination!
Keep it up!
:)
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tunisia bey god bibliography?
Question:
Bey 4
Works Cited
Salinger, J.D. The Catcher In The Rye. New York : Little, Brown and company
Bryan, James. "The Psychological Structure of The Catcher in the Rye." PMLA: Publications
of the Modern Language Association, Vol. 89, no. 5, 1974, 1065-74.
Bloom, Harold J.D Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye. Philadelphia: Chelsea House
Publishers
Bloom, Harold, ed. Holden Caulfield. New York: Chelsea House Publishers, 1990.
Whissen, Thomas Classic Cult Fiction :A Companion to Popular Cult Literature New York:
Greenwood Press 1992
Nyren, Dorothy Modern American Literature Librarian: Massachusetts Frederick Ungar
Publishing Co.
Answer:
What are these?
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could this be true ???????????????????
Question:
Try to imagine what life will be like in the near future. To help you out here are some News Headlines In The Year 2035
--------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, California.
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as California's third language.
Baby conceived naturally....Scientists stumped.
Authentic year 2000 "chad" sells at Sotheby's for $4.6 million.
Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least ten more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesday only.
Results of 35 year study: diet and exercise are the key to weight loss.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Upcoming NFL draft likely to focus on use of mutants.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it crashes BEFORE installation is completed.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters, and rolled up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
Capital Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with Congressman.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%.
Answer:
Hi Ducky,
A living Hell!!! Time to move out of California. True I would say My Friend..
Your Friend,
poppy1
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News clipping from 2029- which is NOT likely?
Question:
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia ,formerly known as California White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Florexico.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States.
Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florexico voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Now, send this to whomever you want and as many as you want, then, guess what....NOTHING will happen. No miracles, no money, absolutely nothing, except you might make someone smile.
Answer:
This is hilarious. We all know that nobody can catch a woman with her mouth shut.
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Headlines From the Year 2029?
Question:
Is this what our future is going to be???
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036. Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Answer:
Haha loved it.
America is falling apart :(
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Surrounding Cities
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